Wanna know what I recently discovered makes the list of things I like?

Sanding.

Staining.

Painting.

Wanna know what I recently discovered about myself?

I.

Am.

Impatient. 

Up until now I thought I had a pretty good amount patience. But I don’t actually think I do anymore.

Wanna know why?

Because I like sanding, staining, and painting.

If you’re assuming they have something in common, they do. And no, it’s not that every single one of them requires a trip to Home Depot.

They’re all instantly gratifying.  You can see the change in what you are sanding…immediately.  You can see the change in what you are staining and painting…immediately.

You wanna know what else is on the list of things I like?

Growing, challenging myself and becoming better.

Getting physically stronger.

Having a really amazing credit score..yeah maybe this one’s weird, but it’s true.

If you’re assuming they have something in common, they do. And no, it’s not that they’re instantly gratifying.

They.

Require.

Patience.

If you really want to get a sense of the kind of person I am…lemme just say this: I’m the girl who will do a whopping 10 curls each arm with a 15 pound dumbbell, and check the mirror the next day to see if my biceps showed up to the party yet.

I was thinking about this the other day while I was sanding a couch that Ivo and I built in the backyard last year.  Instead of sealing it when we first built it like my Dad told us to, we let the weather wreak havoc on it over the winter.

Last week…? Two weeks ago? Sometime during this whole shelter in place deal, we worked to get it back in good condition and treated the wood to protect it.  As I was choking to death on little couch particles that the sander blasted into my face, I was thinking Ah this is so satisfying.  Why can’t it just be this easy to become a better a person, to grow in the areas I know need work?  Why can’t becoming fit and strong be so instantaneous? etc. etc. etc. 

After thinking about this for a while and accepting that I now fall into the impatient category…here’s the conclusion I’ve come to.

The things that are fast and easy and instantly gratifying?  They’re great..but the feeling is fleeting. It’s like K, done. Now what?  What’s next?

The things that take years…that you work for and toward a little bit day by day, week by week, gaining traction and seeing little glimpses of improvement or change but KNOWING there’s more to come…those are what keep you going and working.

Sure, maybe there are points where it’s like come ONNNN how much longer is gonna take to reach the level I wanna be at? But I’ve found in the last few years that if you just put your head down and keep going, eventually you’ll look back and be shocked at how far you’ve come. And that…that isn’t a fleeting feeling at all.

Love,

The quarantine sander and stainer