Sometimes…when I write on here, I like to blog about silly meaningless things. But sometimes there’s also nights like tonight..
Sometimes I wake up so tired that I have to nap in my car at 7:55 in the morning before going inside to work.
Sometimes I feel lonely.
Sometimes I’m not very sure about things, especially when it comes to what my future might look like.
Sometimes I’m grumpy and I don’t like myself very much.
Sometimes guilt over the fact that I’ve hurt people…crushed someone..can reduce me to the smallest version of myself.
Sometimes no matter how hard I try, I just can’t seem to get things to work out.
Sometimes…when I’m feeling all this..I pray things at night like “Hi God, what the actual hell is going on?”
And sometimes after that, I walk into a random store in a random town and see this and think…Ok.
Because maybe….
Maybe I don’t have to have things figured out right now.
Maybe I am where I am, and I’m feeling what I’m feeling for a reason.
Maybe it’s ok that my truck currently looks like I live in it and I only do my laundry once a week.
Maybe I feel lonely because one day I’m gonna meet someone who needs to know they aren’t the only person that’s ever felt that way.
Maybe there’s no point in over thinking, analyzing and feeling bad about things that have already happened.
Maybe it’s ok to actually live in the moment and have fun rather than stress about things I can’t control.
And maybe…just maybe, Everything really is going to be ok…I think it will.
Just maybe not tonight though, and that’s ok. 🙂
Love,
The girl who sometimes maybe uses the words “sometimes” and “maybe” way too much.
Love, Candace 
I love and appreciate your honesty sugar. The prayer, ‘what the he’ll’…is an honest prayer! Read the Psalms and you will see that David prayed the same prayer in no uncertain terms. He then does the same thing you’ve done here by saying ‘you know what, I can’t figure all this out; Your ways are much higher than mine; but I do know that You (God) are my help, you are my strength, you are my fortress, you are my strong tower, you are my deliverer, my provider, my healer, my savior…and Your thoughts toward me, about me, of me…they outnumber all the grains of sand on every beach, on every shore, and in every ocean! He knows about it all sugar, and there are no surprises! Continue to ‘seek Him first…then all these other ‘things’ will be added unto You! Matt 6:33. Love, Dad
P.S. God can handle the ‘what the hell’s”.